Another step forward...

Yesterday we completed round 2 of chemo (Phase 3: Interim Maintenance). So far Cooper has been handling this phase like a champ. He "seems" pretty normal after getting his chemo. I asked him, "Bud, do you really not feel any effects from the chemo?"

He responded, "Well, I felt a little nauseous but I really didn't want to take any more pills so I didn't say anything. Also, I don't think this is from my chemo but my hands and feet have felt really itchy." (that is DEFINITELY from the chemo)

Oh sweet boy. I get it though, this kid is SO sick of pills! This month has been really nice because he gets a break during the week from having to take any pills and he is adamant about not taking anything extra.

Look at those cute bald boys!! 🥰 David said that as long as Coop is bald, he is too. I kind of, no I REALLY love that.

Thankfully, the flu has avoided our house (knock on wood!) but 3 of us have gotten the sore throat/ cold. Praise Jesus that Cooper never got it!! Every night when we say our prayers I pray for a wall of protection so outside illness can't enter Cooper's body. It's a scary, germy world out there folks!

I feel like we are starting to settle a little bit into a rhythm. I was talking with a friend at church this weekend about how if I keep my mind in the present, I feel grounded, I am grateful and there is peace here. Today, Cooper is strong, he is energetic, he is mentally present, he's doing WELL! I like being in that place.

It's when I let my mind wander to the future that the ground starts to shake and I feel so unsettled. Knowing what is coming down the road, the unknowns, the hurdles to still get through, reading stories from other families of kids with childhood cancers and the many different outcomes that it actually can have, I find fear and chaos there. It feels suffocating in my body.

That's when I spin out.

I "know" in my head that God has complete control of all of our tomorrow's. None of us know how many days we have here on earth or what challenges tomorrow will bring. Fear and chaos don't come from God. My heart though can't help but ache at the thought of anything other than Cooper being his strong, funny, witty, thoughtful self here WITH us. It's a love so big it hurts.

The grief and tears still comes at the most random times. I'm guessing (okay I know) they aren't actually random but they sure catch me off guard.

If this experience has taught me anything so far it is how to truly come into the present. I see life a bit different now. There are things that use to be SO important to me that just aren't anymore. My priorities have definitely shifted. What matters most has been put in its rightful place.

Thank you for continuing to lift our family up in prayer!! Thank you for your check ins and the love that keeps coming our way. Every action has been such a sweet light in our life and we don't take that lightly. It matters. YOU matter.

Now, go love on your people with a little extra dose of intentionality today. Today is a GIFT! XO 🧡